I expected “I’m so proud of you!” or “Way to go!” Or, perhaps, a gushing post on social media gushing, in the way only a mother can gush.
However, the expletive-laced congratulatory meme posted on my page by my sixty-year-old mother, who is a teacher and not prone to cursing, was not conventional. Or appropriate.
I’m not in some bubble. Cursing is around everywhere. But it never comes forth from the mouth of my mom. Or was appropriate on this particular day.
It was a day I never thought would occur. As a little girl I had never even allowed myself to believe I could become an author. My first book was releasing and that evening I was headlining a book-signing at Barnes and Noble.
The day was filled with interviews, congratulation texts, and changing diapers. By afternoon I noticed my mom had posted a trophy meme on my Facebook page and her post had garnered an unusual number of reactions.
Why?
Because the words embedded on the meme she posted read:
I am so X%?!XX PROUD OF YOU!
Now if I was a sassy comedy writer or had just made the NY Times Bestseller list this might have made sense.
But, let me tell you about my book. It is a Christian devotional on the topic of pregnancy loss.
I called her.
“Sarah! Today is your day!” she whispered while trying to hide her phone from her 7th grade students.
“Mom, do you KNOW what you posted this morning?” I asked.
“My first picture!” she said.
“Mom, do you know what it says?”
“Not really. I saw a trophy.”
“Mom, it says, I’M SO bleeping PROUD OF YOU! BLEEPING PROUD OF YOU! Mom, I am a christian author. My editor is going to see this! You never even curse. You never even make social media posts. What were you thinking?”
She died laughing and began her defense statement: it was 4am, she had never posted a picture before, her eyes are old, her phone is so tiny that she didn’t even read the words, and would I please explain to her how to delete the poorly chosen meme.
“It’s okay, Mom. I know you are proud. I’ll fix it.”
I had a choice. I could delete the meme or I could keep the accursed congratulatory meme up as a symbol of the pride my mom felt for me.
I weighed my options, laughed, and decided to be real. To be authentic.
And to give everyone needed laughter. I screenshot her meme and made a post about needing to monitor our mom’s social media happenings.
Everyone who personally knew my mother knew this was a meme gone wrong.
As moms we often make honest mistakes, don’t we? Some blunders take the form of bad social media posts while other mishaps are less offensive, like putting our kid’s shoes on the wrong foot and sending them out the door. Yet the intent is the same: love. My mom loves me, and I love her. The same way I love my children, and they love me.
Mistakes are just sometimes mistakes. Nothing more and nothing less. And when our moms make a mistake, we need to show them grace in the same way we hope our kids will show us grace.
Even when it’s a four-letter mishap.
My mom had contributed to my book about pregnancy loss. She was part of the book as she herself had lost a child to stillbirth.
My mom was proud of me, proud of all the women who had contributed truth-telling to the book, and proud that the topic of pregnancy loss was being addressed in such a big way.
Yes, a normal trophy meme would have been more acceptable, but sometimes our mom’s (and we as moms) show mom-pride in monumental ways.
This definitely was quite the ‘mom’umental celebration from a proud mom to her daughter.
Later that evening she attended the book signing. I hugged her tight. We laughed, we cried, and she promised to never post memes again.
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